1sr From Sydney

From Holly for Sydney:

Holly wants me to find what parts of Saskia does she access when she's away?  How is being in Sydney, made up of outsiders, the 'international' city, impact on her? What happens to her sense of confinement? It would be good to get some images of her in Sydney.

September 8 and the Morning of September 9

Bondi, Sydney

Today was the the day of the freak.

I got the feedback from the hairdresser and he thought she was freaky.  I think he thought that she was something along the lines of 'the freaky friend of Holly's'.  This opinion came from my longest impro and interaction with another person, and from a person who had no idea I was doing an impro.

This was not quite the impression I thought she's make.  I kinda wanted her to be on the outside but had no idea that she had gone so far out on the outside to the point of being creepy.  He also found her kinda boring because she never revealed anything about herself.

First thoughts were that I felt terrible that I'd freaked out this lovely man.  The next thoughts were that I was a bad actor making some bad choices by freaking people out, at the same time thinking about how it is to play a character that people don't like and don't know how to deal with.  Next thoughts came about were that I don't have a story, I don't have a drama... and I need one. I need more on her intimate life.

Again... where is her heart?  What is behind it all?

So, out of the panic of that feedback, the general failure feeling, it also made me question the very things I need to and get to explore her inner life.  And the time to do that is now.  Out of crisis comes...

So, I'm out walking.  In Bondi.  Holiday and backpacker heaven, looking at what people are doing, how they're talking, what kind of people they are, going into net cafes, working a little.  No one looks at me twice except to work out if I'm single.  People are cheer-sing with white wines and fags at 3 in the afternoon, settling in for a good time. I walk into a bookshop, looking absentmindedly, a lady stands and says to me 'Emma?'... I take a moment.  'Emily?'.  Emily is a friend of a friend of mine who has moved from Adelaide, is living in Bondi, with her husband and new child.  We get into chat about living in Adelaide vs living in Sydney, what that means, how's she's doing, the isolation of having a new born in a new town where she doesn't know many people, does she want to go back to Adelaide?  Does she want to stay?  Will I stay?  What's happening?  

We met for coffee this morning.  Talked some more about our lives.  She told me about a cool project she did with her husband and two Indigenous ladies from country SA.  They came to Sydney to record a story of their experience.  Emily had recorded her own story, which she said was a really great experience.. telling a story to someone who really wants to hear... and she was to then encourage and facilitate these ladies to do the same.  They overwhelmed with Sydney.  One of the ladies was just 27.  She went and had her hair cut.  She doesn't say much.  The hairdresser tried to get some more words from her about what style she's like, that surely she must know at least what she hasn't liked before is she doesn't know what she would like.  She said that she never had a haircut before.

Emily said that after finally getting her to tell a story on camera, she changed, she opened, she had confidence.  That act of telling a story is a very I guess meaningful exchange.  it gives you life, if puts you in life. That's what I wanted to do with this piece, but use other forms of media and space to 1. tell a story.  2. allow the audience from a story to make the conclusions on a life.